THE HEART OF THE FARM

     Some of the most familiar phrases heard in our house these days are, “have you seen…?”  “Where did you put…?”  “Where do you want this…?” It could be the opener for many a dispute, but so far we have by-passed any misunderstandings in regards to combining and rearranging. The amazing thing is when we get tired of unpacking or rearranging there is plenty of space to take a walk.

     I have found that a good walk on the land is a great cure for momentary claustrophobia.  A stroll around the property gives us a perfect opportunity to investigate the newly dug land mines that have been personally designed by our dogs.  We have no idea if they are on the hunt of wild animals, rodents, bugs or a simply digging a tunnel for the Orient Express; regardless; the holes are deep and many.  We have contemplated that if we could get them to dig in a location of our choosing we could get a healthy start at digging a new foundation for an addition, perhaps holes for tulip bulbs,  or maybe a goldfish pond.  We have a four legged house guest for a couple of weeks, so at the rate they are presently digging, if they were to connect the dots, we could wake up one day soon to find that our home is lakeside property.  The very same holes in the city would have been a serious matter that would have had to be dealt with immediately; fortunately living in the country it is humorous, curious and actually very amusing.  What a difference a few hundred miles makes in ones perception of a hole. 
    
    Once I have had a nice walk to clean out the cob webs in my head and some fresh air in my lungs; helping me to refocus my body and intentions; I am always ready to tackle the next task at hand and sometimes it gives me the opportunity to think up new projects.

    Randy has a good understanding that women need to make a nest.  He admits he doesn't completely understand the chemistry of this phenomena or what women get out of it but he does understand that it important to us and we appear to be comforted by having a nest and tending to our brood.   In an effort to be respectful to him as a man and my husband, I do my best to remember that transitions, even the most welcomed and exciting, does not come without its challenges and compromises; especially when it involves the blending of two more mature lives. 
  
  Moving to the farm has been a combining of many lives, far more than just the two of us in our happy world of Randy and Anita.  It is a transition for Randy, me, our dogs, our children, our grandchildren, siblings and our friends.  Life is Great but different for all of us.  I have the most generous husband with the biggest heart that any woman could ask.  He gives me full rein to decorate, rearrange, reuse, save, throw away, move furniture… whatever it takes to convert the home in which he had been living alone for a number of years into  “our home.” He wants nothing more than for me to be happy living on the farm and sharing in the farm life style that he loves and finds sacred.   Although he really isn’t interested in the day to day issues of redecorating, what we both agree on is “home” is wherever we are together, regardless of the location, city, state or topographical features.  Sharing our lives on the farm amplifies our love more than I could imagine.  I consciously remain respectful of his invitation and hold close his love, never taking it for granted.  I am not frivolous with my invitation into his life and space, yet now I am rearranging his entire world.  Randy openly admits that he had very little furniture and what he did have had no hold on him. He wasn't emotionally attached to anything except treasures from his family and of course his photographs.  What he did have a lot of was vast openness which was ideal for his yoga and meditation practice.  What he didn’t have was a lot of “stuff” to maintain.  To my “Yogi Farmer” I know these are important issues and considerations to keep in mind as we rearrange our world.

    I realize that I am not only building us a nest but I am  redesigning the space that he calls home and his children and grandchildren have known most of their lives as a safe place to come and be themselves.  Now there is a new decorator in town and it is quickly taking on new themes and becoming new space for all of us to sculpt out our own place within.

    Randy and I agree that we want our home to be one that respects the happy memories that have been made within these walls and a warm, open and inviting home to create new and treasured memories.  Our home will continue to be a safe place for all of our grandchildren to have new experiences and build new memories that will influence their lives and be shared with future generations. Our home will always have enough room that we can continue to grow individually and as a couple; it is a home where our friends know they are always welcomed. It is a home where we can bring all of our experiences and life lessons from the last 59 years and create something that comes closer to defining who we are now, individually and as a couple.  We are indeed blessed that all of our children and their mates and friends have facilitated and positively influenced a successful blending of “stuff.”  They have all been exceptionally loving and generous with their hearts and their backs.  With the help of all those who love us, we have an excellent start to an amazing life on the farm full of enough love for all of us.

Lessons I have learned:

·     Our memories are embedded in our hearts and spirits not in “stuff.”  There is no rearranging of furniture, lives or locations that can destroy, steal or hide them from us.

·    Things we love on the farm are many; cows, horses, dogs, cats, fields, pastures, trees, wildlife, ponds, creeks, flowers, crops, etc; but the heart of the farm will always be the home we share with those we love.

·     Dogs can dig endlessly with no known goal and appear to take pleasure in their accomplishments. They work harder and longer at digging than some people who are being paid a wage for a job.

·     Being able to burn trash in the country is very cathartic for those of us who occasionally need instant gratification.

We bless this home with love and serenity and our doors are open wide to welcome all those who enter with peaceful hearts.

I love the Farm

&

I Love You Randy